Punchinello’s Chronicles

November 23, 2008

Punchinello Goes to Washington!

Filed under: View from the Bottom — Punchinello @ 3:17 pm
Tags: ,

I’m packin’ my bags! Yup, Mr. Obama just now, today, promised me a new job! I’m gonna be livin’ on Easy Street, flush with cash, and life will be totally fixed! I just don’t know if I should back one or two bags, what with air-travel being so weird these days. Enh…doesn’t matter! I’m gonna have a job! I don’t know where yet, I’m waiting for the government to tell me.

Let’s see…last year, the Bush administration sent out a $150-billion stimulus package to get the economy going strongly. Although I qualified, I didn’t get the actual money because I owe back taxes. So Mr. Bush paid the IRS for me, and that was okay. Even so, the economy was Totally Fixed for a couple of weeks, and I couldn’t complain.

Then the economy was Totally Unfixed again, and Congress — we need a new name for them, maybe along the lines of “Pelosi’s Gang?” — anyway, Congress pushed through $700-billion to Totally Refix the economy again. That worked pretty well, other than the stock market losing what…fifty percent of its value? Oh, and nobody other than bankers getting lots of money.

Now Mr. Obama is demanding a new, even bigger and better stimulus package. It’s one of his Top Priorities for 2009! This time, though, there are conditions. Not only will this new package be another $700-billion, but he and Pelosi’s Gang “demand” that it immediately create new jobs!

So let’s see, where do we stand so far (10 times 8, minus 700 billion, times two, carry the nine, divide by X over Z, with the square root of Pi, times 5……….) Ah, I’ve got it! $1,550,000,000,000 and counting. That’s $1.5-TRILLION dollars at the moment.

But that’s okay, I’m gonna get a job! The President says so! Congress demands that it happen! Therefore, it will happen.

I wonder if I’ll be working for the IRS?



  1. I wonder who the will throw to the wolves to pay for this???

    Comment by Judy — December 9, 2008 @ 11:09 pm | Reply

  2. We don’t have to throw anyone to the wolves. We’ll just print money. In fact, my Great Uncle Joey used to print money all the time. Then he got busted, and ended up spending his retirement in Sing-Sing. He was a great guy, though, always willing to loan you a couple of extra hundred bucks.

    Comment by Punchinello — December 10, 2008 @ 12:08 am | Reply

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